Hit A Ball, Feel Better

Embracing late stage capitalism in a tennis skirt.

Venice pop paddle tennis courts at sunset.

The other day, I had a flashback to the 2020 election. I was staying at my friend Sarah’s place in Hawaii when I realized that Biden would win. I went to a 7/11 and bought a canned Mai Thai and some spam sushi, and went to the beach. The Mai Tai tasted like orange liquour mixed with Nyquil and not sure why spam sushi is a thing, but I felt so much relief I didn’t care….I was so young. We all were.

If I am going to survive two and a half more years I have to find an outlet and a way release my anger. So 2026 became the year I joined the ranks of racket sports players and began my journey to play paddle tennis, also known as Pop Tennis.

First of all, IT’S NOT PICKEL BALL. It’s tennis with a paddle. Like this:

It’s just like regular tennis but on a smaller court and with deflated ball. The courts have been on Venice Boardwalk since the 60s, right by the neon food stand. It’s all very Venice-y and if you don’t know what that means I recently wrote about living in Venice here.

A little busy?

I always wanted to play but never got my act together until 2021 when fate intervened and I matched with a guy who invited me to meet him at the courts. I figured the worst case scenario would be that I finally play paddle ball, which was the scenario that unfolded.

He brought me a racket and water and gave me some tips. I hit the ball and…that was it. I was in. The game, that is, not the guy. He was not terrible but engaged in a type of radical honesty sharing that left me a little creeped out. He told me that he was unemployed (no judgement) because he was let go from his teaching job (a little judgment), for a “thing” that happened with a student (alarm bells).

I knew I would never see him again. However, because I have issues leaving conversational situations with men I stayed to hear about his mayoral political campaign. I don’t think he is a 2026 candidate for LA mayor, but I will forever thank him for introducing me to paddle tennis.

I never played tennis growing up so a racket swing is not in my physical repertoire, But over the past month I have taken lessons and played actual games…with points and competition, which I was not prepared for. My main goals are to get the ball over the net and look cute in a tennis dress. No matter what anyone says, I know they want to win, especially the dudes. No matter what anyone says I feel the pressure of the Andreas fault when I have to serve.

Need to wear lots of sunscreen.

My coach asked me why I am not more competitive and I told him “because I don’t have testosterone.” But I wanted tos ay “because this doesn’t matter…whether we win or lose, we’re still going to get old and die.” It has become my mantra. Deep breathe, whisper “this doesn’t matter…we’re still going to get old and die,” hit ball. Seems like a negative mantra, but it works better than “don’t f- this up.”

Of course some things matter…but Hinge dates and paddle tennis, dating….seriously it doesn’t.

Love Venice sunsets.